Parent Guide on Social Media and Mental Health

There are many advantages to allowing your young adult or teen access to social media, such as finding a sense of community, expressing themselves, experiencing diverse people and ideas, and finding a creative outlet. You may have wondered: can social media also cause significant harm to my child's mental health?

“Adolescents, ages 10 to 19, are undergoing a highly sensitive period of brain development, a time when mental health challenges such as depression typically emerge.”

— U.S. Surgeon General

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), “mental health includes our emotional, psychological, and social well-being.” Our mental health affects how we make decisions, speak and interact with others, and deal with stressors.

Social media is a category of applications and online websites or platforms focused on communication between individuals or groups. These forms of communication enable the sharing of many forms of information and content, including images, videos, and other files. Social media spans apps and websites ranging from YouTube and TikTok to Fitbit and WhatsApp.

Although social media offers a place for your child to communicate with others and a community to express themselves, your child could experience many harmful things because of the actions of others. Social media and the content your child may be exposed to could lead to heightened emotional sensitivity or even a decrease in life satisfaction. Your actions could reduce the chances of, or even prevent, these incidents.

“Frequent social media use may be associated with distinct changes in the developing brain in the amygdala and the prefrontal cortex.”

— U.S. Surgeon General

“Youth and teens who use social media more than 3 hours per day face double the risk of experiencing symptoms of depression and anxiety.”

— Yale Medicine

Pictures, videos, and other content that are not appropriate for teens or young adults can be found on most social media platforms. If your child is exposed to such content, it could cause them to think less of themselves, feel anxious about viewing it, and fear punishment, discipline, and conversations with their family.

Most of the time, children do not actively seek this content out. It randomly appears or pops up due to algorithms, direct pushes, and targeted direct messages.

“Up to 95% of youth ages 13–17 report using a social media platform, and more than a third of youth 13–17 say they use social media constantly.”

— U.S. Surgeon General

Make a pact with your child to be aware, supportive, and mindful, and help your child seek help when necessary.

As a family, set boundaries and rules about social media. Reach agreements on how technology and social media fit into your lives as a family unit.

Try to limit social media use to 30 minutes a day. Modeling this habit yourself will also strengthen your bond with your child, because it leads to more conversation.

“Decreasing your social media usage by 30 minutes a day improves depression scores by more than 35%.”

— U.S. Surgeon General

• Delay the age of first use
• Establish tech-free zones
• Be available to your child for conversations and discussions

You should certainly “friend” and monitor your child's social media content, but avoid being intrusive. Give your child the benefit of the doubt and start a conversation rather than confiscating their phone and sifting through messages. Those actions can damage the relationship and limit or eliminate open communication and your child's sense of security and safety.

When you or your child reach your personal social media time limits, choose another activity. Keep a running list of things you, your child, and your family love to do. Go on a walk, start a puzzle, play with your pet, or play a game as a family.

Research shows that being active improves physical and mental health. Volleyball, bocce ball, swimming, or another physical activity decreases the time your family spends on social media and ultimately improves overall health.

Strive to start regular, open conversations about social media with your family. Encourage accountability and ask open-ended questions that lead to meaningful conversations:

• What do you like about social media? What don't you like?
• How do you feel when you are on a social media app or platform?
• Have you ever been surprised by something on social media, or have you ever felt uncomfortable?

Frequently review the people, organizations, and groups you follow. Unfollow or remove yourself from situations that are not a positive model for your child. This includes reporting cyberbullying, online exploitation, and content you feel is inappropriate. Show your child how to report suspicious online activity, and model it with and for them.

“The internet provides a lot of information, but it does not have your values. Share information with your children before the internet does.”

Creating and maintaining a daily routine can improve overall health. Setting time boundaries for social media and other activities, and setting a bedtime, will improve your family's sleep, decrease anxiety, increase moments of happiness, and help reduce stress.

If you or your child have questions or negative thoughts about yourselves or others, reach out to a mental health professional. See the local and national resources below.

Healthy conversations only happen with compassion, empathy, and open-mindedness. Listen carefully, understanding not only the words but also the emotion behind them. Here are questions to help start a healthy conversation with your child about social media and mental health:

• How do you feel after spending time on social media? Do you notice any changes in your mood?
• Do you ever find yourself comparing your life to what you see on social media? How does that make you feel?
• What do you think are the biggest pressures you face on social media?
• Have you ever taken a break from social media? How did it affect you?
• Do you think social media affects how you see yourself or how you interact with others?
• Do you think social media puts pressure on people to look or act a certain way?
• Have you ever felt stressed or anxious because of something you saw online?
• How do you handle seeing negative or upsetting posts on social media?
• What do you think are some good ways to use social media without it affecting your mental health?